It's good to walk

For many reasons, and not just the obvious health and fitness blah blah.  Not necessarily out in open country, up a fell or on moorland - tarmac, pavements, parks, as long as you keep moving.

Walking was something I just did, without thinking of it as therapy or mindfulness.  From an early age if ever I got stuck in a particular mood I walked it off.
I was lucky to live where I did, there were plenty of places to go where there wouldn't be people.  My feet seemed to know where they were taking me while my head was otherwise engaged.

Sometimes walking makes you aware of what's around you, all the sights and sounds, other times less so - you're looking inward.
Sometimes it's political, sometimes (as in the case of Richard Long) it's art.

Some years ago I walked one of my favourite routes with an artist who used GPS to map where we went.  Why are we going here? This is a tree I like to visit 'cos it's huge and old and looks like an Ent etc.
The artist did lots of walks with lots of people and produced a book to record them all, the GPS providing intricate drawings of each walk.  Mine looked like a very chaotic net.

Back to the here and now... I have lost my connection to this much-used and much-loved activity.

Anxiety is a bitch.  It brings primal instincts to the fore, especially fight or flight, which changes everything.
Outside feels different, and so do you, your senses on full alert.  Everything sounds louder.  You feel acutely self-conscious and vulnerable, as if you are in a hostile environment - instinctively checking for exits.  This would have been useful to our ancestors who had to keep an eye out for predators, but these days is somewhat irrational.

You tire easily, have less stamina.  You find yourself looking down at the ground and after a while it seems to rise up, making you feel smaller.  You forget to look up.  You want to be invisible.  You have to think about your feet making contact with the ground and start counting in your head, thinking about breathing to manage the nausea and panic.

Something you were so used to doing has become hard, and you no longer want to do it.  And then you get stuck.

On the radio , a man with Depression  decides he'll walk around the country with his dog.  Being on his own seems to help, to keep moving also.  It takes him out of himself mostly, there's so much to see and hear and this fills him up.
He is able to sleep since the fresh air, weather, and the many miles he's covered are exhausting.
He bonds with his dog over the weeks as they form an attachment as companions.  He realises he can live with a lot less 'stuff'.  He smiles and talks to strangers, which is a thing he'd usually avoid. 

Yet despite all these positives, at the back of his mind he is thinking about the fact that the walk will come to an end.  He'll have to go home.  He can't just keep walking.  Then what?  Back to sitting on the sofa for hours saying and doing nothing?
I sincerely hope not.

"Walking is not just political - walking is the natural rhythm of thinking.
When we stop this essential activity we really do become the sitting ducks corporations want us to be."